What the hell doesn't make family rules at home? • Parents work hard and are so tired when they come home that they cannot find the energy to say no to the child.
• There may be problems between spouses at home. Therefore, the family's mind is often engaged in these issues and the emotional energy required for the child's healthy growth is limited. Depressive symptoms are common especially in their mothers: • The family tried some methods according to their own, and when they failed, they gave up hope and accepted the situation. Because whatever he does, he doesn't believe the child will change, so he gives up quickly. However, there are always appropriate and alternative solution options.
• Some families think that if they say “no ına to their children, they will lose their love. Parents should consider their needs rather than the child's love. In fact, it is not an unacceptable child, but an unwanted behavior. The behavior is undesirable because the child's use of this pattern is likely to harm him or her in the future.
• Another reason is that there are inconsistencies between the parents and the extended families regarding the rules. The same behavior is sometimes tolerated, but sometimes the child's head is confused. It shakes the sense of trust in parents.Child's weaponsAll people want their wishes to be fulfilled. There are steps to be followed to reach these requests. The child also actually uses some ways for requests. The first and foremost is crying. Because all the needs of using this path until one year has been met. But even if the growing child cries, he is faced with the fact that he no longer has all he wants. Although he doesn't know it yet, some of the things he wants are harmful and even dangerous for him. Although he is not aware that he is living in a society for now, his parents expect certain behaviors from him and give him certain rules. Because parents know that when they grow up, they will have to spend their labor and patience for their needs. If he wants to be taken into play, he must follow the rules. It is the family environment where the skills are laid.How to react?According to behavioral theory, all behaviors are learned by learning. If parents reinforce positive behavior, the most effective way of reinforcing it is the words of good and effective well done, satisfaction expressions. Behavior is used more often. If the child is misbehaving and is not taken into account, it is a reinforcer. Parents should be alert to this situation. For example, if a child cries not to go to sleep at night, not actually sleeping is a reward for him and a good reinforcer.
This should not be ignored if wrong behavior is observed (for example: demonstrating anger with violence). There are several ways to do this. Parents should gain the ability to give effective command. Every time an undesirable behavior is done, the parents should be able to say “No! Kısa in a short and clear way without the eye and shouting of the child. In cases where this does not work, they can use the break method, which is one of the most effective ways for parents and children to calm down and review the situation.
If the outbursts of anger and seizures are accompanied by sleep and appetite deterioration and crying, and the child expresses that he / she is not liked frequently, we should think that he / she may be unhappy. Let's not forget that depression is a disease that can be seen in children and may present with irritability. It is often accompanied by unhappiness in the family.
One of the most difficult periods of children, also known as the anal period, is the period between the ages of 2-3 and the period when anger attacks are most frequent. It is the period in which the feeling of self occurs in the child. Therefore, we should keep in mind that there may be periodic outbursts and this is a part of the development. This is sometimes possible by reviewing our own attitudes, sometimes by recognizing the possible problems in the child, but by taking action. If families think and develop themselves on this issue, they will definitely have a good return to their relationship with the child and thus to the child.